Warning! Hanging in There is Destroying your Health!!

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Just “Hang in There!”

Warning! Hanging in there may be destroying your health!

Are you aware that stress may be killing you?

We are tough. We are strong. We are just hanging in there until it is a reasonable time to:

Leave the relationship
Go to the doctor
Quit your job or find a different one
Ask for help
Have that difficult talk 

Warning! Hanging in there may be destroying your health!

But are you aware that “hanging in there” can destroy your health?

Here’s what happened to me

I got married and suddenly I became a notch down on the totem pole. I absolutely loved doing things for my husband, taking care of his needs, making him happy and I always put his needs above my own. Then two years later we had a daughter together. The pregnancy was awesome and my husband was very attentive and generous with his time. Once the baby was born, things turned upside down. I swear, I had barely gotten home after being cut almost in half with a C-section and I was no longer given any grace.  I don’t know exactly when the thought process became such that I wasn’t important to myself anymore. Or maybe I just wasn’t as important as everyone else. My daughter, being a helpless baby,  was my priority and my husband ran a close second. 

You probably put yourself behind everyone else for many reasons. I know there are plenty of reasons for me:

I don’t want to inconvenience anyone else
I don’t want to be seen as needy or sick
Maybe it’s not as bad as I think it is
I don’t want to spend money that could be used on someone else
My family needs me so I can’t get down physically or emotionally

Why this is wrong thinking

I know you’ve heard it before but hear it again – If you don’t take care of yourself, you can’t take care of anyone else. It’s true, if you are a physical, emotional, or spiritual mess, you can’t expect to help anyone else in those areas. And the further down you get, the longer it will take to get out. Sometimes it even takes a crisis to make us realize that we are human and we need care as much as the next person.

Then it becomes a vicious cycle.  When you are stressed out (and who isn’t?), it affects your body in a negative way. I’m no doctor or scientist, but I know from experience that stress makes you sick. And fat… and grouchy. And causes a lot of other problems. Stress is one of the main factors in health decline because is affects the body in so many different ways… ways that you may not even realize

Good Stress

Back in the day – and I do mean way back in the day, stress was a good sign. It still is a good sign but in quite a different way. You see, back then, when people were hunters and gatherers, there were many things that were a threat to them. Suppose Dave was out hunting for the family’s evening meal when suddenly a bear appears out of nowhere.

STRESS!

Immediately the fight-or-flight response kicks in and adrenaline and cortisol course through Dave’s body and he has to make a decision to either fight the bear (and maybe get the evening meal!) or run like all get-out to save his own life.

That is the good type of stress because it let Dave know that he is in danger and and needs to act fast. When everything is over and Dave is safe, his adrenaline and cortisol subside and and his breathing returns to normal.

He’s good to go until the next time he sees a bear.

Harmful Stress

Dave was good with stress because it came and it went. It didn’t stay around forever beating his body up. These days, there is stress everywhere! Between family, jobs, bills, relationships, health, politics…. there is stress everywhere. This in turn leads to more problems and more stress. The assault of stress keeps us in a constant fight-or-flight mode, which affects the cortisol release in our bodies, which affects the adrenals, and it goes on and on.

In the end, we (notice I said WE) have extra fat, lethargy, mood swings – and that is just the beginning.


Do it now if you have been hanging in there for too long. Go ahead and

Leave the relationship
Go to the doctor
Quit your job or find a different one
Ask for help
Have that difficult talk 

Take a moment to evaluate what needs to be done to alleviate at least part of the stress. Make it a priority to find ways in your daily life to resolve some of the overshadowing issues because hanging in there could be killing you!

— JKMayfield

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